A Reprise

Last night I had a series of dreams that revolved around disease. The first dream was the most distinct. A maiden, like Rapunzel, waited in a tower for her knight to return to her. She waited for him for many years of her life. When he came to her, she was consumed with bittersweet joy. He was now hers, but his mind was eaten with a sickness that did not allow them to communicate. He could not understand her, nor could she understand him. It was as though he was a madman. Their time together would be very short before his life ended. She took him to bed and cared for him, consumed with sorrow that they would never truly be together. The second dream was about my grandfather. The others were more vague. The last dream contained pieces of all of the other dreams, and named the sickness that tied them all together. I woke feeling that I understood everything perfectly, but when I thought about it for a moment, I understood nothing, but the dreams filled me with deep sorrow.

Thunder lashed against the windows of my small place of exile. Where I sat at my desk, I could feel the vibration through wooden floor boards. Drawing my shawl more closely around me, I listened to the howling wind. With a shuddering breath, I pushed my small desk clock away. I did not want to sleep. I had begun to sleep during the day and pace awake at night. The dreams came in daylight just as they did in darkness. The call of him was distant, a vampiric howl above the crackling flames, flesh burning. I summoned an acrid odor in my imagination, a bitter, choking smoke in my lungs. The betrayal was tart on my tongue. I could not think of it all at once. Restlessly I rose and moved to the other side of the room, away from the window, where there was a mirror. I sensed her presence just beyond the glass, the presence of the other one. My reflection was all I saw, just a woman in a long robe, with a long plait over one shoulder. I touched my own image and tried to imagine her smiling fac...

Road trip to Colorado, day 2. An abandoned house off I-40 near Soncy exit. We looked for the Cadillac Ranch on two different days and never found it. However we drove out into a pasture to have a closer look at this house. There were crows in the bare trees surrounding the house. The doors were open to visitors. The floor was covered in muck. It looked as though cows had wandered freely throughout the house. View from the window, an abandoned paddock. The front room. The kitchen. Room at the rear of the house.           

South Texas: pine forests, hot humidity, green Central Texas: scrub brush, rolling hills, yellow grass and prickly pear, hot Panhandle: flat land, yellow grass, no trees giving way to red rock, canyon land, mesas, scrub, cactus, hot, warm, windy New Mexico: desert scrub, dormant volcanos, mesas, mountains, arid, cool, windy Colorado: mountains, blue and green, white, cool, plains grass giving way to rocky mountains, green grass, rivers and streams, evergreen trees, woodland life

Cross Creek : autobiographical, her life in rural Florida.

Freemasonry has been a subject interesting to me since I learned that my first Texas ancestor, Napoleon Storey, was a freemason. So it was with great pleasure that I took the opportunity to enter and photograph a masonic lodge, informed by the local masonic leader about the organization as I did so. This was a composite of famous American freemasons. I was able to look and photograph all I wanted. The masons offered no explanations as to the meaning or use of the objects in the ceremony hall; nor did I ask them. In the center of the hall. The dining hall. This was my favorite place. There was a lingering smell of sandwiches and good country cooking. On the wall are members of the Order of the Eastern Star, a related organization for men and women dedicated to public service. This was the founder of the order in Grand Prairie. His portrait was very high on the wall above my head, and it was difficult to get a good picture. I found his appearance, emblem...

   Beautiful dresses in a shop window. Masonic Lodge. We toured the interior on invitation from two masons standing nearby, one of whom was the local head of the organization.