A Reprise

I am trying to work on some Ecto formatting problems, hoping to make my blog more readable. An offline blog editor is an absolute essential for me. Since acquiring a Mac, I have not found anything satisfactory. I have switched to HTML Editor Mode, hoping the editor will not put "br" tags between my paragraphs and double-space them anymore. It is possible to remove these in my in-browser Blogger interface, but I might as well be saving my entries to a text file and copy-pasting when online if this is the case, rendering this not-free software useless. The Mac switch has been a tricky adjustment for me. I have always used Windows-based computers and am used to a great deal more control over my files than I now have. I first encountered the "Apple" culture on my iPhone which was basically the only option available to me when my last Treo died, and Palm was no longer a part of my plan. I loved the fast browsing and brilliant visuals. My Treo looked like an 8-bit game ...

In studying generational theory and the turning-over of eras, and the repetition of eras, I feel like I can see this pattern in my own life, but it's not completely clear. Often I feel like I've entered a time when I am just like I was at a certain age. I can see it in my actions, words and preferences. I can also characterize my eras by discoveries of art, culture or entertainment that have made an astounding change in me that starts radiating outward. I can also think of eras when I have not had a reference art/culture to inspire me, and I have struggled artistically and otherwise. I normally don't recognize the discovery at first. It will bother my mind as something "strange" bother me more and more until I turn it over and reconcile it. It is always frightening to reconcile this new thing into my character. I tend to be drawn to things that I know other people will think are strange, so there will be a time of resistance and questioning as I ask myself who...

I can't believe it, there's going to be a NaNoWriMo chapter in my immediate area for all of our little small towns. I'm so excited, I have to go to an event now, finally. I have written three wrimo novels -- the only novels I ever complete now will probably be through this challenge. If I finally go to an event I may meet the Other Unicorns. They may even live around me. My god, who knows??? I am so excited about what I'm writing this year. It is everything I am and everything I need to say right now. It's about my reading, my ideas, my spirit, and the way I've become this person now. I can't wait for November. I am still trying to decide if I'm going to put it online or not. Right now I'm saying yes, but not right away so I can have some breathing room, say what I need to say all the way without worrying about putting it out there. But I will be posting my daily word counts here. The NaNoWriMo site crashes or is really slow in November (when peop...

Confirmation Christmas Party , a photo by ladyhildegarde on Flickr. always I have had one foot in dark waters... one day perhaps I will really jump in.

Here's my first ecto post... we'll see how this goes. I have been trying to find an offline editor for ages since I got the Mac. Well I read another interesting thing in The Fourth Turning : apparently what our vision of the future can define our generation. The book goes back over the kinds of futuristic movies that were made at the turn of the century all the way up to now. Sometimes these movies present a marvelous space-age world, and sometimes a dystopic post-apocalyptic wasteland. I think it's fascinating that our vision of the future hundreds of years from now actually reflects the way we feel about our present world. Till I thought about things this way I did not really see the literary value in science fiction. Now it makes science fiction seem really important to me. The Age of the Confessional Self. This is our present literary age which began in the early 60's when the first Gen-X'er's were born. I have been reflecting in my reading, that even ...

I have been dividing my time between The Fourth Turning  and Moon Magic . The Fourth Turning  is fascinating the way it talks about what is going on right now, even though it was written in 1997. So far everything it's predicted about the media and social attitudes has come to pass. The Millenial/Gen Y still has not come forth and expressed itself. According to the book, the "hero" generation doesn't do that until the time of the crisis itself. Until that time they don't have a collective identity. Last night I drew the 6 of cups. The 6 of cups is about nostalgia, childhood. This is the second time I've drawn a card like this querying for strength and what will help me get through. Moon Magic  continues to be a turning-point reading for me. I identify most with the author simply for creating a character like this and learning from her. I feel I have done this with Lady Hildegarde, and I reflected on her yesterday to see what she is "doing." I w...

Happy lunch, love, I am still here, and I am still capable of writing whatever I like. I have so much to tell you, so much to say. Sometimes I think I am the same person as I was in 2003. There are definitely shades, but I have realized so much, and the shadows in myself as I see myself at the beginning of my journey are the beginning points from which I grew. The plain, tenacious part of me. That is the same. I wish that I could talk about lovely things, but I find it is not a lovely day. I am fighting something again, I do not know what I am fighting. For weeks now I have been getting this feeling, ever so often that I am fighting. This weekend I received some great revelations about conflict. I did not come into this world equipped to face conflict. No, I want to tell you about another story. This is not a nice neat blog entry. It's choppy and hard to read. The only authentic thing I can give you is the reflection of my mind, and this is a mirror that will reflect it. ...