A Reprise

I drive out to the old house at the end of a dirt road. She has seen me from the window. She has put on a kettle of hot water. We will have tea and talk. She opens the door even as I gesture with agitation. "We must talk," I say. "And I, I did not know you would still be here." Josette laughs at me with her green eyes. "Where would I go? You have set me up so comfortably." I study her red apron trimmed in rick rack. I remember that fabric. "I cannot do this without you," I say. "I simply cannot. My judgment is skewed. I have been a fool." "But you are not a fool now," she guesses. "As long as I am this person, I say I am a fool. But on a particular point I have been foolish. If only you had been there. You could have told me better." "No one can tell you anything, madame." "Actually I have been a fool on many points." "As Hokei admonished Hofuku, 'That is enough talking. Let us have a cup...

This afternoon I saw the photographs of Nell Dorr at Amon Carter, which was a boon as I am interested in a feminine and antiquated perspective over the 1950's and 1960's. My energy is now concentrated in this century. After work I came to the museum and walked around. I am possessed with a terrible energy now. I work furiously, and then I can't rest. I want to learn more. I am frantic to understand things and people. My mind never rests. At night, my dreams are frenetic. I feel impotent to express, because I have no understanding. In my world I see work. I see industry. I see people shaped by their experiences and by their innate person. I do not understand why I work, why I desire to work. Is it because I believe in the American value of hard work? What is that value, even? Working hard for its own sake, or working hard for material gain. Is either one a reason for living? What can I learn from my day-to-day life? What meaning can I extrapolate? I also desire to understand...

Remove the impurities from silver, and the sterling will be ready for the silversmith.

Hi~ customer^_^ Let me introduce NEW Glamor Model line - Nayuta Kenzo that have a manly semblance and a delicate body more than 71cm Model doll Male. His delicate muscles and perfect body lines are soooo cool! Glamor Model doll would be a good match for Model doll female. ^^ His masculine beauty is absolutely stunning. - Normal head + assembled body - D Glass Eyes(random) - wig - boxer short - Box, 2 cushions, COA * Tall : 75cm * Circumference of Head : 23cm * Circumference of neck : 12cm * Circumference of chest : 29cm * Circumference of waist : 23cm * Circumference of hips : 27.6cm * Width of shoulders : 16cm * Lenth of \"from hips to ankle\" : 43cm * Lenth of \"from knee to ankle\" : 24cm * Foot size : 10cm * Eye size : 14mm (Diameter) That's pretty huge! Well, I am putting aside the BJD business for a while but not forever. One day I'm going to have a tea master, and we're going to continu...

Is erratic behavior true insanity, or is it a result of not understanding yourself? What is my position on obsession? Is it bad? Can it be good? In my fiction it has always been a subject of dark beauty, stemming with King Haggard's obsession with unicorns in Beagle's The Last Unicorn. However, there are many ill effects to obsession, dramatic and ugly, that I have never communicated in my writing. What is depression? Is it different from melancholy? I was interested in and acted out the subject through my first hero Anton, who rather than being brooding and dark, was actually depressed. But at that time I had never experienced true depression. Are anxiety and depression different sides of the same disorder? Do either of these conditions result from obsession, or does obsession result from these conditions? Emotions and issues to be presented in Red Rose. Understanding of the self. What makes each of us unique? Obedience to authority versus personal ethic. Curiosity about...

Picture from Nathan. Henry uses my tea table for his cave.