Skip to main content

Fleur du mal

I awoke to the sound of commotion, and my mind juddered with panic. I stumbled to my feet from the floor whose filth was revealed in the early morning light, my tools surrounding me, a damp, dirty rag stuck to my elbow.

M. Giraud was shouting. I moved to the top of the stairs to watch in horror as policemen shackled him and dragged him to the door. His protests were as vehement as they were meaningless. He was a criminal, and I had dreaded this day when my life would once more become upheaved and uncertain.

As an officer glanced upward, his eyes blue and sharp in the gloom, I ducked, but too late. He alerted his comrades to my presence, and they were thundering up the stairs, those remaining, while M. Giraud was out of sight and out of earshot.

"Mon dieu, he's keeping a girl. Look at this waif. Poor creature."

I trembled and hulked in the corner, kicked at their advancing shins shrieked when arms came around me.

The officer who held me had not a cruel or biting touch. M. Giraud had never touched me. Before coming to him, I had been rudely pinched, poked and pressed, astute at eluding grabbing hands as a wild thing is expert in self-protection though witless in all else.

His arms around me were warm and solid, and the temporal melding with a fellow human took some of the fight out of me.

I gazed up at him warily.

"Is the painting secure? The painting?" Someone else was coming up the stairs. The tone was guttural and fierce.

The woman to whom it belonged appeared in a shaft of sunlit dust motes. She was dressed in a tailored brown skirted suit and hat. From beneath its flat brim were visible ebony tendrils. Her forest-green eyes penetrated mine.

"Who is this girl?" she asked abruptly. Her lips moved with sudden pity as she investigated my tattered form.

She swept beyond me to the gilt-framed painting, approximately half the size of herself in subject and peered face-to-face with what seemed her own image. Though I had spent all night restoring the decades-old painting and recognized the colors, technique and costume as distinctly Napoleonic in style.

Popular posts from this blog

Love oneself

I have found a new barometer by which to judge my actions, or rather, it is an involuntary barometer that is improving me perhaps without my say. For every weak thing I do or begin to do, I ask myself if I would admire myself for it. I have felt so critical of myself lately, so ugly, so awful, and out of it has sprung this quest to improve myself. I don't want to become a slave to style magazines; rather, I could not admire myself for doing that. At the same time, I want to look right and decent and keep from embarrassing myself. I feel like my hygeine is always falling short, just like the housework. Every time I turn around, there's hair where hair shouldn't be, there's stuff under my toenails, my tee shirts are shrinking up and showing my stomach; to say nothing of my wildly oxidizing jewelry, scuffed shoes, &c. I don't understand why I don't see anyone else with these problems! Do they spend all their time at home cleaning their jewelry and ironing their

Studying with Dolls

In the afternoons, I usually take my laptop or a book to the bed and study, and a doll for company. Gertrude is sitting on my bed desk. I got her in 2015 from the Korean doll company Dollmore. She's a "Flocke" sculpt. Willow is sitting with my headphones. She's made by the Chinese company Angel of Dream. I got her in 2013. She's a "Qing" sculpt.

Then, they let Margot out.

Work is going to be really tough for the next month and a half. There is really no margin for error in the goal I have set. I will have to make and run at least one sample, sometimes two, every day. I am going to have to work overtime in the beginning just to leave myself a little room. Long ago I read this story about people who colonized Venus. The storms cleared, the sun shone, and plants grew only one day every hundred years. On the day the sun was to come out some children locked the nerd (I'm sure that would be me) in the closet, and after the day was over, they let her out. That is how I felt yesterday. I could only get a table far in Starbucks, so I didn't know what the weather was doing. I had planned to shop for my spring wardrobe and I did that very well. It took two hours, which is really a lot less than it would take in person, and the things I got were very much to my taste, but I stepped out into warmth, sunshine, and balmy air, and there was only an hour left in